I got up early that morning and my son was still sleeping. His eyelids were closed and I did not want to wake him up, as the sound of his breath was music to me. I remember the first time I held him in my hands. At that time the thought of leaving him to an unknown place never came to my mind. In fact, I could not think of any unknown hands touching him. His little feet were bigger now and fingers longer. It was time for him to go to the kindergarten, but I wanted him to sleep for that last minute in peace as I know he will not like it.

I never expected to be that emotional mother, but I was wrong. When the time came to leave him in kindergarten, I noticed the mist over my eyes and my voice trembling. Though I was happy that my sweet little child was growing up. But, you know the mother’s emotions. I was somewhere a little bit afraid to leave him under someone’s care for three hours. The fast heart beats were not letting me leave his soft and gripping hands. Standing at the entrance, I managed to control my emotions and tried to be a strong Mumma.

Either way I just made my mind that it was  a major milestone for my first growing baby. With this I finally left him with his caretakers. The moment he left my hand and went in, I got numb, my eyes got shut, and I could hardly digest the fact of staying back at home without him for three hours. That day I got the value of three hours.  I was back at home, but it was partly me. My mind, my heart was all there with my little one. Constantly paying a glance towards the clock. I triggered a flood of emotions since  morning that day.

Damn, why were the hands of the clock running slowly?

It was still half an hour for the clock to hit 2 o’clock. And, I was there in the kindergarten waiting for my son to come. It’s been just three hours and my eyes were longing to have a glance of him as if I have not seen him for years. It was motherly love. Aadat nahi thi na abhi tak apne laal ko najro se door karne ki.

Finally, he was there and self-depreciating me, took a sigh of relief, giggled and said to myself – He’s fine. The radiant eyes, the short legs taking short steps, while maintaining the balance ran towards me and hugged me tightly. I could feel he missed me, just like me. His little hands could hardly cover my long and round neck, but the tightness in those arms reflected the love. My heart beat could feel how unsteadily, his heart had been beating to hold my hand, take a look of me and wrap me in his short little hands with affection. I was also worried if he really missed me, and would hesitate in coming to the place for the next time.

Now, I was cozy and my impatience asked how was your day, my bacha? Just like most of the kids he had been excited for the school. He told me, how he found his seat and made friends with a girl named “Khushi”. Just like me he could not keep patience, opened his bag and showed me the coloring he had done. Though, there was not a drawing or anything you can make out of that paper, but my baby was happy about it. He was filling colors in his life. He was enjoying it perhaps.

While we both were walking toward the vehicle to go back home, he didn’t keep quiet even for a second. My sweet little kid was explaining every little thing he did, how the teacher made him sit in her lap and do the drawing, how he played with the children around and everything.

The mother in me was happy that my son was enjoying this phase of life. It made me proud that he was such a big boy, but also hurt a little because he grew up a little more.

Happy Parenting with Budding Star

About Akansha Bansal

Post graduate in Masters of Business Administration from Panjab University, Chandigarh. She live with a notion “SIMPLE LIVING, HIGH THINKING” and have an optimistic approach towards life. Always eager to learn new things... She loves to write blogs on parenting. She is the Co-founder of "Budding Star".

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