Though every mothers heart fills with immense delight when she sees her children happy and doing good in life, how many of us are actually happy souls ?

A new mama is sleep deprived and beyond exhausted. The mom of a toddler often worried about her tiny tots fussy eating habits. A teenagers mom worries about her child getting secretive and distant. And mother of a grown ups worry about every possible thing about their children. Not only that, every mother is judged by a hundred parameters everyday. From choosing the way to feed her baby to raising her kid the way she does, a mother always faces criticism for her choices. And guess what, no matter what she does, she is always a bad mom.

So, in spite of all this is it possible to be a happy mother ?

YES, I say. In life a lot of things are out of our control but certain things are always in our control. The outside circumstances are out of our control but our response to it is certainly in our control.

After connecting and talking to a lot of mothers I came up with a list of 8 secrets of a Happy Mother.

1. Happy Mother’s put their health before anything else.

Mothers across all ages have the habit of neglecting their health because apparently they are too busy taking care of their family and children. What they do not realize that most of the times women are tired, exhausted and lack energy because they are not supporting their body with adequate food rest and exercise. When I was a new mom, I was overwhelmed with motherhood so much so that I spent all my time taking care of my baby and the rest complaining about how tired I was. I was irritable and miserable. Then my gynecologist advised me to take some time out from my routine to take care of my body. I followed her advice. I ate better, slept when I could and started going for walks three to four times a week. And in just one month I felt so much better about myself.

2. Happy Mothers delegate.

It takes a village to raise  a child. So gather your tribe and let them help you with household chores. Allow your partner to feed your baby. Appoint help to do the dishes. Because a happy mom is never shy to share the load.

3. Spend some time in a day doing things only for themselves.

Even if it means you postpone an important chore, it is essential that you spent some time of the day doing things that make you happy to be alive. And that something should not be for your baby or family. For example, one of my mommy friends spend thirty minutes every day gardening. Another likes to watch the sunrise, alone and undisturbed. Do what makes you smile, pamper your soul even for a few minutes. But do not compromise on those few minutes.

4. Happy Mom’s do not compare or compete.

Every life is different. Every family is different. Every individual is different. Your Facebook friends may look happier in photos but their lives may not so perfect. No one’s life is perfect. It’s okay if your kid is a late bloomer, it’s okay if your house is not so organised. At the end what matters is how many warm memories you made with your loved ones.

5. Happy Mothers do not let negative feedback affect their peace of mind.

If I took every parenting feedback seriously, I would have ended up in an mental asylum. Instead, I choose to ignore the negative feedback. That way I am able to preserve my sanity and protect myself from mommy meltdowns.

6. Happy Mothers laugh often.

Sometimes it seems like we have absolutely no reason to laugh. It is in those times that we need a good laugh. Because it’s scientifically proven that Laughing instantly reduces the levels of stress hormones such as cortisol, epinephrine (adrenaline) and dopamine, and increases the production of serotonin and endorphin which reduce effects of stress. Laughter also works as an effective distraction from things that cause anxiety and anger.

7. Happy Mothers connect, share.

Most of my mommy friends confess that connecting with friends and like minded people helped them with the everyday struggles of parenting. Happy moms share their experiences, seek wisdom of other moms and stand with each other emotionally and otherwise.

8. Happy Mothers let go.

And this is the most important aspect. Happy moms are not always in charge of the situation. Sometimes they just let go and be totally okay with it. Happy moms accept imperfections. They appreciate the beauty of life as it is and count their blessings more than their troubles.

A happy mother is a woman who knows her flaws and loves herself anyway.

Happy Parenting with Budding Star

 

You may be interested in reading-

Little Things Mom miss every day

Learning of a Mom from Post-Partum Depression

About Satarupa Mishra

Satarupa Mishra homemaker and mother of a lovely baby boy formerly worked as a researcher in the field of plant biochemistry. An author in making, Satarupa loves to write about her personal experiences as a mom and everyday struggles of women in India. Minimalist, travel enthusiast and book lover since childhood her nocturnal romance with writing is a recent pursuit.

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