Loneliness is the worst possible situation, I guess. We all have faced it many times in life. What if we don’t have anyone to whom we can open to. At times we can’t share even with our better halves. We need someone who understands our inner souls, who knows us from the time we were kids. Yes, our real brothers and sisters. They understands us at all easy and difficult phases. What if our mothers had thought of having one kid only???? Most of new moms are so panic after having first baby that they don’t even dare to dream of having second kid.
Hey! Mommie’s it’s not that difficult. Its my personal experience. I am mom to 4 and 1 year. The journey has been awesome till now. So, here I am trying to resolve the phobia of planning second baby.
Pregnancy, delivery and finally raising of a kid brings so many challenges in women’s life. All the moms have experienced that hard to forget pregnancy period accompanied by so many physical, emotional and of course, social changes. You have almost cut off yourself from fashion, picnics, late night outings and all the fun. Also, by this time you have learnt to have a good control over your taste buds due to common problems like acidity and blood pressure changes. Altogether it’s a tough time for you and your better half. You get so many advises from people around in order to keep us up during this challenging hours of life. Finally, you deliver a baby with much a painful procedures whether it be a normal delivery or be a cesarean section. Only you know the sufferings. Yet the battle is not won.
As your little one arrives you prepare for another, most challenging phase of life, Mommyhood. We, our mothers, grandmothers all know this thing quite well. You start getting up with kids cry in the morning and what to say about night, you are always half asleep. Time passes and finally, if you are lucky, your kids gets scheduled to sleep at night. Situations are still not very comfortable. As the kid is six months, now you become worried to introduce solids. Trying new recipes each day, Google out all the nutritious things. Trying each day, a new thing. Your tummy becomes a kind of dust bin as you never want to just throw such stuff made by so much of efforts. Every time you visit doctor, you are concerned for heights and weights issue of the baby.
And how can you forget that nights when kid is wheezing, coughing with high fever. At night of course you are retired and also dad is fast asleep. Whatever your situation is, you have to be there with the kid for whole night though hundreds of households are waiting for you the next morning. Also, those wet and dirty pants you are continuously washing for about two years because with many diapers does not serve very well. Only you know the headache of giving toilet training to your kid. It takes about 2.5 to 3 years till your kids starts playschool. At this stage you feel LITTLE RELAXED.
Now what I m going to say may appear absurd and foolish but trust me this is the right time for planning second baby. This is the best time for give your elder one a sibling. 3 to 3.5 years gap is perfect.
Planning second baby:
Believe me giving birth to second kid is much much easier. Reasons being:
- By this time you have regained the lost nutritional balance.
- Once your body has undergone maternity hormonal changes, second pregnancy in most of the cases is smooth due to adaptive nature of human body.
- You are well aware of common pregnancy related health conditions and their remedies.
- You are now mentally prepared for all those physical as well as emotional changes.
- Your family also have an experience of your maternity.They can help and guide you better this time.
- This time you already have your pre tried and tested healthcare centre.
- Another important reason is that your elder one is too small to question you regarding this issue. Big kids may embarrass you at moments.
- You still remember the important medications.
- And yes, you still have your maternity wears in your wardrobe.
- You still remember all that nutritious diet chart which will now serve for both of the kids.
Now comes how about delivery:
If earlier your laboratory lasted for 8 to 10 hours, this time it may reduce to even 3 to 4 hours. During my first pregnancy the labour doesn’t initiated even after completion of the third trimester. I went through long labour of about 12 hours after the artificial induction of labour. But to luck, birth of my baby girl was so easy. Natural pains started on due date and I delivered her in just 2 hours. I could not even imagine the procedure to be so simple and easy one.
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Now comes the raising part:
- This time you are not scared holding and touching new born.
- Nurse does not need to guide you for breastfeeding.
- You are better able to take care of yourself.
- You are familiar with post delivery problems.
- You well arranged baby wardrobe and baby bag because you very well know the requirements.
- This time you have very few questions to ask doctor before leaving the hospital.
- You come home happy and relaxed.
- Your elder one is by the time trained to help you with the baby. Like, he fetches nappies and diapers from the rack.
- You are aware of kids sleeping schedule.
- You are not as afraid to give your baby a bath as you were before.
- You are mentally prepared for sleeplessness.
- You are ready with all dadi maa nuskhe for kids.
- You know well how to tackle vaccination pain.
- Time just fly away till the little one is 6 months.
- By this time elder start enjoying with his sibling. And this is the most precious time for you as well as your kids. You need not to teach him how to share, forgive, help each other. The typical Indian inherited Sanskars will automatically come into play.
When you see your kids enjoying with each other, you realize what you had snatched from your elder one if you haven’t planned second baby. Rest of the things go very smooth. Time just flies and you just need to teach your kids how to live happily. Once both your kids starts going to school, you are free to do anything either your career or your households.
I request all the readers to please encourage others to plan at least 2 kids. This is the best gift we can give to our kids. We can save them from the feeling of loneliness when they grow up. Our generation has enjoyed the Sibling-hood then why should we deprive our kids of this awesome pleasure. Raising second kid is much easier. Believe me it’s really easy and results are more promising and positive for both the kids.
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